First of all, belated Rosh Hashanah to all Jewish readers and I hope Ramadan is going well for those of the Islamic faith.

A strange old week last week.

For the first time ever in almost 4 years of doing this job I called a halt to an appointment. Asked him to leave. Let me tell you it's not an easy thing to do at all. I've had guys visit me whose numbers are now stored in my phone as 'dont see again 1/2/3/4 etc' But I've always managed to get through the booking with a smile, even though I'm thinking 'what an idiot!' And the fact they still phone me for bookings must mean I put up a pretty convincing performance! But not this time. I simply did not feel comfortable or indeed safe with the way the guy was behaving. But it wasn't easy and I felt quite bad for him afterwards (I'm a soft touch sometimes)and I personally felt like a bit of a failure. Hard to explain. But hey, my perogative in the end. I'm comfortable with the decision now, it's all good :)

Then had a booking with a porn star in the making. Waves to Mark. Nice fella but boy was he energetic. My back still hurts by the way, thanks for asking. I am FAR too old and decrepid for all those porn film position shenanigins I tell ya! Solid shagging for an hour? Deep throating? But .... what about a nice cup of tea??!! LOL

But the week ended on a very high note. Hello Jay :) What an extraordinarily sexy and nice person you are. And anyone who can identify a Zero 7 album by the first 5 notes is ok by me. Diamond geezer xxx

Oh and this week so far I have found out that snakes poo once very three weeks or so and it smells so disgusting it wakes you from your sleep. Apparently. Yes one of my guys handles more than just his own trouser snake.....

This week I'm mostly listening to The Decemberists new album and eating cheese with apples and grapes. Blame Jamie Oliver. Here's the inside of snake's mouth.

Salaam xx

I find these round robin questionnaire type thingys strangely compelling. It appeals to the lazy arse in me. Ahha I exclaim, a blog entry and I dont have to think! And its a really long one so it looks like I have put some effort in. Thanks to Kimberly on one of the boards I read.

1. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING? ? One of the Rebus novels by Ian Rankin

2. WHAT TIME IS IT? 09.25

3. WHAT'S ON YOUR MOUSE MAT? A grinning 50's blonde with the legend 'I did your boyfriend'

4. WHAT'S YOUR FAVOURITE BOARD GAME? Trivial pursuit

5. YOUR FAVOURITE MAGAZINE? Don't read them

6. BABIES? Not for some years

7. FAVOURITE SOUND? Rainfall

8. WORST FEELING IN THE WORLD? A proper 24 carat hangover

9. FIRST THING YOU THINK OF IN THE MORNING? Coffee.......coffee.........

10. HOW MANY RINGS BEFORE YOU ANSWER THE PHONE? Work phone, as soon as. Private phone, depends if I'm feeeling gregarious

11. FUTURE CHILDS NAME? As if

12. FAVOURITE COLOUR? Orange

13. WHAT IS THE MOST IMPORTANT THING IN YOUR LIFE? Self acceptance

14. FAVOURITE FOOD? Anything with pasta

15. IF YOU COULD PLAY AN INSTRUMENT? I have tried and failed miserably


16. DO YOU LIKE TO DRIVE FAST? No certainly not and I dislike people who do. A car is a lethal weapon

17. DO YOU SLEEP WITH A STUFFED ANIMAL? Dont talk about my partner like that......

18. STORMS - COOL OR SCARY? Very cool

19. WHAT WAS YOUR FIRST CAR? Small dirt brown mk2 escort

20. WHO IS THE ONE PERSON FROM YOUR PAST YOU WISH YOU COULD GO BACK AND TALK WITH? My Father

21. FAVOURITE ALCOHOLIC DRINK? Jack daniels

22. WHAT'S IN THE BOOT OF YOUR CAR? A map, a dogs bowl, an empty bottle, one of Hannah's hair extentions

23. DO YOU EAT THE STEMS ON BROCCOLI? Yes if its cooked right

24. IF YOU COULD HAVE ANY JOB YOU WANTED, WHAT WOULD IT BE? I'd like enough money to live off comfortably so I could do voluntary work overseas

25. EVER BEEN IN LOVE? Yes!

26. IS THE GLASS HALF FULL OR HALF EMPTY? You can always squeeze a bit more in :)

27. FAVOURITE MOVIE? Charlie and the chocolate factory

28. DO YOU TYPE WITH YOUR FINGERS ON THE CORRECT KEYS? no

29. WHAT'S UNDER YOUR BED? Dust

30. WHAT'S YOUR FAVOURITE NUMBER? 2

31. WHAT'S YOUR FAVOURITE SPORT TO WATCH? Football even though I'm a West Ham fan

32. IF YOU COULD BUILD A HOUSE, WHERE WOULD IT BE? Side of a loch in Scotland

33. WHAT'S YOUR FAVOURITE ARTICLE OF CLOTHING? My warm fluffy dressing gown

34. BEACH, MOUNTAINS OR CITY? Beach

35. TECHNOLOGY OR ART? Art

36. COMEDY OR HORROR? Comedy

37. FAVOURITE PHYSICAL FEATURE OF THE OPPOSITE SEX? Hands

38. FAVOURITE TIME OF DAY? Dinnertime

39. THE LAST CD YOU BOUGHT? Placebo Meds

40. WHAT'S YOUR FAVOURITE PLACE TO BE MASSAGED? Back

41. WHAT'S MORE IMPORTANT TO YOU. STRONG IN MIND OR STRONG IN BODY? Mind

42. WHAT TIME DO YOU WAKE UP IN THE MORNING? When the dog needs a wee

43. WHAT'S YOUR FAVOURITE KITCHEN ITEM? Smoothie maker!

44. WHAT MAKES YOU REALLY ANGRY? Adverts on telly, specially the ones repeated ENDLESSLY on channels like Bravo. Yes I watch Bravo, Dog the bounty hunter is on there!

45. WHAT DO YOU PREFER, A SPORTS CAR OR A 4 x 4? Couldn't care less, a car is heap of metal to get from A to B

46. DO YOU BELIEVE IN THE AFTERLIFE? No. I think.

47. WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE SEASON? Oregano. Maybe lemon pepper.

48. IF YOU COULD HAVE ONE SUPER POWER, WHAT WOULD IT BE? Flying

49. IF YOU HAVE A TATTOO, WHERE IS IT? Bum

50. CAN YOU JUGGLE? No but I can jiggle

51. WHAT'S YOUR FAVOURITE DAY? How can you have a favourite day? God these things are banal!

52. WHICH DO YOU PREFER, SUSHI OR HAMBURGER? Hobsons choice

53. WHAT'S YOUR FAVOURITE CARTOON? Family guy.

54. IF YOU COULD TAKE A VACATION ANYWHERE IN THE WORLD, WHERE WOULD IT BE? St Barts

55. DO YOU HAVE ANY PETS? Yes my beloved little dog

56. EVER HAD A 3SOME? Several times a week

57. DO YOU OWN A SEX TOY? Erm, yep

58. BEST INVENTION? Sliced bread. What was the best invention BEFORE sliced bread?

59. YEAR YOU LOST YOUR VIRGINITY. I was 16, nuff said

60. FAVOURITE POSITION. Silly mid off


Now you're brain dead!!! *evil cackle*